December 18, 2001

What's News?
   by mike <mike@pfft.net>

Where's bin Laden? Why can't we find him? How bad is this recession going to be? How in the hell did the Chicago Bears get into the playoffs? PFFT.

These are all questions being asked by the media (except for the last one - that's mine). What I want to know, however, remains "Who killed Chandra?" As much as that story of the Congressman [Gary Condit, that slimy bastard] and the intern who disappeared [Chandra Levy, who wasn't even that pretty; what's up with governmental infidelity? Don't they have any hot interns in D.C.?] annoyed me, it was never solved.

Condit, I'm sure, breathed a sigh of relief that would rival most Okinawa typhoons once the terror attacks in NYC took center stage. The man made another entrance into the spotlight by having the gall to announce his candidacy for his incumbent seat in Congress. Sure, he was never proven guilty, but he's shamed yet another public office and caused enough paranoid questions to come out of the woodwork for Mel Gibson to make Conspiracy Theory 2.

Disappear, Mr. Condit, before you disgrace yourself again in the public arena. The real world can get rough; wear a cup.

Published: December 18, 2001
Editor: stacy