December 28, 2001

Microsoft Strikes Again
   by rcn

I've never submitted anything before, so this probably won't be very good, so I think we'll start with a PFFT! to my bad writing skills.

Now the main point of my PFFT! Two years ago, I bought a brand new computer which at that time was state of the art (333 MHz, 32 MB RAM, Windows 98 - which is where the problem lies, naturally... PFFT! to change which renders state of the art computers useless after two weeks). Anyway, over the last two years I've watched my beloved computer become slower and slower and slower. Now, these days it takes my computer five minutes just to start up! It takes another three or four minutes to connect to the Internet.

So, this morning I'd decided I'd had enough of my computer making like a tortoise so I decided I'd find out ways of speeding it up. I connected to the Internet and wasted four minutes of my life, then when the search page finally came back with my results, I clicked onto a site that was saying if you want best results from your old computer, install Windows 95 on it. Well, they didn't have to tell me twice! After finding my Windows 95 disc, I thought I'd look in the Windows Help file (hahaha) to see exactly what I had to do. And the help file told me I couldn't go back to Windows 95 because my disk is compressed (whatever the hell that means) so basically until I can scrape together enough money to buy myself a new computer, I'm stuck with THIS.

My main PFFT!s are to Bill Gates, for letting Microsoft screw everyone over like this, the site that didn't tell me I couldn't go back to Windows 95 if I had compressed disks, and the retailer who sold me this computer without telling me the disks were compressed. Oh, and I guess I should PFFT! at myself for not knowing what a compressed disk is.

Take it easy, and have a great new year... best way to do that would be to steer clear of anything that says "Microsoft" on it, in my experience. ;)

Published: December 28, 2001
Editor: stacy